I miss arwah mama & fiance

Terasa sayu sangat Ramadhan this time around. One thing for sure and definitely is of course sebab teringatkan arwah mama. Do you know that during Ramadhan semua roh akan berkumpul dan memohon kepada Allah S.W.T to be brought back ke bumi? (some were granted and some were not). Perkara pertama yang diorang akan lakukan is pergi ke kubur untuk melihat jasad diorang. Then diorang akan pergi ke rumah anak-anak, rumah-rumah sesiapa yang mendokan diorang. And if i'm not mistaken, they are longing for doa-doa keluarga dan kenalan yang hidup untuk dibawa balik sebagai bekalan.

I'm truly wish and berdoa for arwah mama to be in this group. I got the feeling she is coming to see us. Sit with us. Maybe laugh together seeing how we are doing in the family. If only i can touch her.......again....Ya Allah, I am so, terribly and horribly miss her.. Usually today mama will prepare foods for us untuk sambut Ramadhan. Rendang, nasi impit, kuah kacang, u name it. Semua ade. All those memories hovered in my mind, intangible and untouchable. But today, what lay on the table is just sebuku roti and yesterday left over foods. Tak sempat nak prepare ape pon. :( Insyallah, ada time i will cook for them dan yang penting niat dan usaha untuk gandakan amalan..untuk arwah mama, and for everybody around. I love you sangat-sangat mama!!

Beside that, another contributor to my sadness is because i'm not going to have the chance to sahur, buka and pegi pasar ramadhan together with my fiancé. :( He will only be back after Raya. :( :( Kesian dia, kena sahur bread&egg and buka pon with limited food. Hope you will doing fine over there, and jangan sedih-sedih macam I sedih kat sini. It’s not good for your study…ok?

Eventho they are not physically with me, and no matter their whereabouts, I will always love them all (of course la kan). They are the most important people in my life and I will always pray and call upon their well being.

But at this moment, without the two of them, i am lonesome!